Chris and Katie, Nathan and Tiffany, Matt and Erica, and Scott and Meredith Light Up This April

This has been a busy spring and I haven't had the time to write a blog about the wonderful couples I  married in April.  I love writing a blog about each couple if I can.  A blog about a ceremony brings back the joy I've felt with a couple as they begin their marriage with the love and support of their families and friends.  I'm very happily married and I love helping launch their marriage in a way that celebrates their love.

However the other side of our journey of life has required attention from me this spring.  My 91 year old mother-in-law has entered hospice.  I am reminded how time passes oh so quickly.

A quote  by Andre Maurois speaks to this:  'A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short.'    I wish each of these beautiful couples below many long and rich conversations.

In early April I got to marry Katie and Chris at the NC Botanical Gardens.  We are lucky that the rain had stopped the day before and the day was cool.  They had their reception inside at the large banquet room but in a private corner of the gardens they held there ceremony for about 100 people.  Chris graduated this May so there were many joys to celebrate.  They wrote their own vows  and had a unity candle to honor their joining.  It was a sweet and loving ceremony.

 I officiated Nathan and Tiffany's ceremony at The Cotton Room in downtown Durham.  I've done many ceremonies there and Michelle Aldred and her staff at Triangle Catering are always great.  May 2012 was their 6 years anniversary.  Nathan proposed at the Old Well all decked out with lights with a 100 yard extension cord and a generator that a friend had provided.  He pretended it was a photo shoot so it was a surprise to Tiffany.  They are a fun loving couple who are grounded and solid in their love.  I wish them much joy.

 I married Matt and Erica at the Bryan Courtyard of the Carolina Inn.  A favorite place for me.  And now that they have finished their remodeling, they have much easier parking and the courtyard is still the same lovely classic wedding site it always has been.    They met in Seville, Spain during their Junior year abroad for UNC and began dating the fall of their senior year.  They've known each other for eleven years and had a long distance relationship for 4 of those years.  They're delighted to now be in one place together.  We offered an Irish Wedding Blessing in honor of Matt's heritage and welcomed Erica's family who came from Peru to share this day with them.  They are both generous spirited people who have large loving families.  I was so glad to be with them to celebrate their love.

 I had the joy of marrying Scott and Meredith at The Sutherland in an elegant ceremony in mid April.  Thank you to Ashlee, owner of The Sutherland, for her wonderful coordination of the event. Their ceremony music was provided by Save the Date musicians with a saxophone and guitar duet.  It was very unique.  Scott's 90 year old mother was there.  Both sets of their parents were still married so we honored that between the two couples they had more than 70 years of wisdom about love and marriage that still inspires Meredith and Scott.  In our prayer of blessing for their marriage I said, 'May the love that warms our hearts today and the love that flows between Scott and Meredith always be strong.  God grant them the inner gifts of trust, compassion. forgiveness, and truth that they may live and grow together in love and peace.  Amen.'

Some couples I marry request that I don't blog about them.  So I will just wish them many many blessings.  For some couples I never get pictures.  I send love to Elizabeth and Bruce, Alex and Kim, Tom and Carol, Christina and Eric, and Jean and Santiago, who I also wed this month, one couple in the backyard of their new home, one in the pergola at Duke Gardens, one in the Stone Chapel in Wake Forest, one at Spruce Pine Lodge, and one in my living room.

May they all find happiness in their love for each other.  May their love bring out the best in them as they bring our the best in each other.  May they have love that lasts a lifetime!

Eric and Alicia Are a Delight to Marry at The Hill Courtyard of The Carolina Inn

 It was so much fun marrying Eric and Alicia this May.  They are warm, funny, relaxed people who have friends to love them a lot and families who are gracious and kind.  What more is there to ask?  They also had wonderful Sally Oakley as their Wedding Planner and Punam Bean taking marvelous photos.

I so appreciate Alicia and Eric remembering to send me these wonderful photos that bring back their wedding to me so vividly.  

The Hill Courtyard of The Carolina Inn can be a little bit noisy if it's a busy traffic day.  But Alicia and Eric's wedding wasn't troubled by that at all.  No town buses and no Harley Convention.  Yay!  Their wedding was just rich in love.  They both went to UNC and by request you can see that I'm wearing my Carolina Blue stole.  Always a treat for me who went to UNC-G for my Ph.D. program.

In the opening I said words that seemed to fit them especially well:  'Alicia and Eric, each of you brings gifts to the other today: Gifts of hope and laughter, focus and seriousness of purpose, sensitivity and recognition of the beautiful and the profound. But these gifts are not to be yours alone. A strong and resilient marriage is not an escape from the world but a contribution to it. Eric and Alicia, may you now combine and strengthen your gifts, to be offered as a distinct and beautiful gift to the world. For the world is in need of the beautiful, the good and the holy and nothing is better suited to evoke that than a good marriage between two people as in love as you are.'

Eric and Alicia wrote their own vows that I printed in my book so that they didn't have to worry about bringing a piece of paper into the ceremony. I also printed them 14 point type and phrase by phrase so that they could look down, read a phrase and then look up and speak it to the other.  They hadn't seem the other's vows before the ceremony so it was a special delight to see how both vows were not only loving but descriptive of who they are and their love for each other - so funny, and warm, and tender.

 These are the words I used when I spoke of the symbolism of their rings:  'These rings are your gifts to each other to remind you always, and those that gaze upon their beauty, that you have pledged your love and commitment in marriage to each other. And when you have been together for a long, long time, you will look at these rings, and you will feel the indentation they have made on your fingers, and you will know that these rings contain all the memories of what your lives and your relationship have been. May they always serve to remind you of how great your love is for one another.'  

I loved these words we created to honor their parents.  Eric's father was his Best Man, so you can see him in the picture above.  'You both value the kind of love your parents have – where after decades you are still together with your best friend, you are still holding hands in the supermarket, still laughing until you cry.  Still growing, cherishing time with family and friends, laughing and loving together.'

Alicia and Eric got engaged in New Orleans and they love the jazzy sound of New Orleans style music.  So the celebratory sounds of a New Orleans Style jazz brass band led the recessional, while Alicia contributed to the festivities holding a feather trimmed umbrella as they walked down the aisle.  It was a very classy moment and set the tone of much joy that last through the whole evening and is still lasting for them now.  

They were sweet in their thanks saying, 'Thanks so much again for all that you did for us - it really was the best ceremony we could have ever dreamed up, thanks to you!'  But we know it was really them, and we were all basking in their love.  I wish them many many happy years and much much loving.

Ever wonderful Tre Bella Florist created their flowers, and every delicious Ashley Cakes provided their cake.  Their guitarist, Dave Aduddell played 'Falling in love at a coffee shop' by Landon Pigg for their processional.

Matt and Beth Celebrate Their Love in A Sweet Ceremony at The Carolina Inn

It's a treat to be able to celebrate Matt and Beth's Ceremony on March 31st in the Bryan Courtyard at The Carolina Inn again with you now.  I've been doing ceremonies at the inn for 17 years and the staff there always does a great job.  I especially like that, in these later years, they have required a wedding planner to work with the couple if the couple is having their ceremony at the inn.  It helps ensure that every detail is well taken care of.  And they always have the best folks.  For Beth's and Matt's wedding Erin McLean of Erin McLean Events handled all the details.  She was a joy to work with.


Thanks, too, to Robin Lin of Robin Lin Photography, for these radiant photographs.  To see more go to Robin's blog at http://www.robinlin.com/blog/2012/04/17/beth-matt-the-carolina-inn-wedding-chapel-hill-north-carolina/.   Her photos are always great.


A string trio from Save The Date Music provided the music for the ceremony and A Watered Garden created their wedding bouquets.  I love color and when I asked Beth what color she wanted me to wear and she told me any shade of blue I was curious.  Seeing her attendants dresses in all those lovely shades of blue was striking.  And I especially loved Beth's dotted Swiss dress.  How often do you see dotted Swiss these days! 

Matt and Beth have a dog named Egg.  It was fun to mention him in their ceremony and it accented the elegant occasion with the note of humor and their personalities that brought out the twinkle in their eyes.  But they had been twinkling quite a bit that day.


They also chose a reading I love but I don't see couples choosing often.  It is from excerpts from letters of Vincent Van Gogh to his brother Theo.  Like Van Gogh's art, they are vibrant and alive and full of love for all of life.


Beth and Matt had their first look before the ceremony.  I find that this often relaxes couples so am glad when it works for them.  And Robin Lin got great pictures of them with the classic Southern architectural features of the Carolina Inn that are so lovely.

I love that the couples I marry are creating lives of meaning and passion in so many ways.  Beth shot me a quick note after I followed up with her about getting copies of their license (which I send to all couples) with a quick note, "Everything was awesome!  Sorry for the delay in response- I have an immunology mid-term today that I've been studying for - my test is in 1.5 hours!'

I trust that the exam went well and with the semester now over, they can celebrate some more.  I wish them many blessings and a long and wonderful life together!

Wayne and Jennifer at the Carolina Inn

Jennifer and Wayne can celebrate two anniversaries, and I'm delighted for them. They didn't let a legal snafu deter them at all in their celebration. Everything was arranged for their wedding at The Carolina Inn on February 13th but then Wayne's divorce weren't finalized in time. So we just changed the wording of the pronouncement and we let everyone know that as soon as possible, I'd be performing the legal ceremony with two witnesses. Which I did on Friday, April 9th at my home in Hillsborough. And it was joyful, too.

I loved the way that Wayne and Jennifer just went with the flow, which was good since they were busy people right about then. They have a beautiful little boy, Christopher Johnathan, born in late March. I wonder if they're so even keeled because they both work in hospital settings and they have crisis all around them everyday, or if it's just who they are. Either way, they were a delight. And I got to see lots of people celebrate who they are and their love for each other on both their wedding occasions. Amy Kortus was the harpist who set a perfect musical tone to go with the ceremony and the elegant setting at The Carolina Inn. She's always so professional and a joy to work with. She even took these pictures for me during the ceremony for which I was very grateful.

In Jennifer and Wayne's ceremony I got to tell the guests some of the amazing gifts of self that Jennifer and Wayne each bring to their relationship and their love. It's a real pleasure to do this for a couple because so often we fail to see our own gifts when we so easily see the gifts of the ones we love.

And I got to bless their son and the family they are creating, even before their son was born. I love doing that, too. I believe we are all born blessed and I love putting that to words for a new young life.

And at the end of their ceremony, I blessed their marriage with the words, "Go forth bound together by the love of God. Go forth with hope and joy and a heart full of dreams, knowing that God is always with you. Amen." Since I believe we're a universe based upon love, no matter what name we call it, I love this part of the ceremony, too.

All together a good day for them, and for me. I left them just getting ready to go across the hall to a small banquet room to enjoy and elegant lunch with their family and guests, and this gorgeous cake.


As soon as I find out who made it, I'll let you know.