Libby and Michael at Merry Oaks, NC

On August 15th, Michael and Libby were married in the little town of Merry Oaks, NC.

Merry Oaks seems like just a sweet name of a highway sign to passers-by. But just off the freeway, tucked around a corner is a wonderful funky old bed and breakfast that called to Libby and Michael for their wedding. I couldn't even find its contact information on Google, so if you want to know how to reach it, contact me and I'll ask Michael and Libby.











It used to be a farm house with an old post office and train station. The artist Ann Hill used to live there. It's decorated with old hub caps, and today its history continues to grow, rich with laughter and life.

In renting the whole place Libby and Michael had a casual country place with a lawn and garden that was perfect for their gathering of about fifty close friends and family. They wanted someplace casual and enjoyable. And they wanted their wedding to be that way, too.


Friends provided the cupcakes and the wonderful jazz music, QShack completed the food offerings with delicious bar-be-cue (which you don't see because I needed to leave before that time to travel to Carrboro for another ceremony), and .........

Libby's sister was her Matron of Honor and Michael's brother was his Best Man.








And there would be room for their dachsund, Lulu to be a part of the festivities.









They have one of those amazing stories that speak of fate lending a hand. They had met briefly long ago but had moved to different cities. Then later in Detroit, they lived in the same apartment building, but Michael moved in just as Libby was moving out. Then Michael started getting Libby's mail and they ran into each other at a drug store when both of them were dating other people.

Finally getting the message the universe seemed to be telling them, they began seeing each other, which led, after three years to their wedding day, August 15th.

All the photos you'll see in this blog entry were provided by Lacey Gadwill who has a wonderful casual touch.


Michael and Libby had moved down from Detroit not too long ago and have a close set of friends and family.

They had a special part in their ceremony which spoke to this closeness.

"Dear Friends and Family, Without you, we aren't possible. You raised us, befriended us, brought us together physically, mentally, and spiritually, fought with us for freedom and justice in a world often lacking both. And today you have given us the great gift of being present at our marriage. In all this, all of you prepared us for this day, with unity with each other today, before you, before each other, before God and before creation. Thank you!

Our sons and daughters grow older, become independent, fall in love and marry. But marriage is not the end of their previous relationships to family and friends. Rather it's a process which requires constant care and attention. In this process Michael and Libby will need the help, support, love, and care of all of you who have been so important in their relationship so far.

Do all of you gathered here today, who have nurtured Michael and Libby so long, bestow your blessings on their union? If so, answer, 'We do!'"

This is a group shot of everyone who said, 'We do!' There were no dissenters.


Friends came from Seattle, New York, New Orleans, and Detroit to be with them.

Michael and Libby found a moment to share a cupcake during the reception.

I hope all their life will be sweet with these memories of their wedding day.

Stefan and Kate At The Sarah Duke Center in Durham

On August 29th, I had the honor of performing Stefan and Kate's marriage ceremony at the wonderful Sarah P. Duke Center in Duke Gardens, in Durham, NC.

We were all nervous about rain that weekend, but a storm roared through Durham about an hour after the rehearsal on Friday evening and we were blessedly left with the cooler weather brought in by the front. The water lilies were blooming and a blue heron graced us with its presence on the pond during the whole of the rehearsal. We all considered it nature's blessing on the occasion. Kate and Stefan both love the natural world. So much so that their ceremony began with these words:

"We are here today to celebrate the marriage between Stefan and Kate. The life this couple has created together is imbued with much love. They share not only a deep romantic love, rooted in sincere friendship, but also a love of life and its offerings. They share a passion for exploration of and protection of the natural world, and a respect for all cultures of the earth. The interest and values that brought them together in the beginning continue to unite and inspire them."













The Sarah Duke Center has amphitheater seating which faces the pond and which is perfect for this size group of about 120 people. You can see the Sarah Duke Center behind, where the reception was held. It has a large lawn and a walkway where the wedding party gathered to enter the amphitheater. The cocktail hour, was held on the covered porch (you can see its roof in this photo.)

Allison Davis of Sandfoot Photography took all of these fabulous pictures and you can see more on her web site. Ken Holmes of DJ Bunn Co. was the DJ for the music for the ceremony and the reception. He found the perfect spot for a good view, unobstructed but also discreet.

Both Kate's parents walked her down the aisle, which at the Sarah P. Duke Center is wide enough to do gracefully. She entered to a Celtic harp version of the traditional Bridal March.

Christy White of A Designing Mind, event floral designer combined cymbidium orchids, jade roses, South American line hydrangeas, Sahara roses, bells of Ireland and Yoko Ono green button poms for the beautiful floral bouquets.


Stefan and Kate each chose different vows to speak to the other. While most couple do not choose to do this, it's always a treat for me when I know that both people have taken the opportunity to say vows that uniquely fit their love for the other.

Kate has an Irish heritage so wanted the family's Irish wedding bell to be in the ceremony. We created a ceremony for the bell where they ring the bell on their wedding day and promise to ring it whenever they need to be reminded of their love for each other as it is on this day.

We then had the delicious moment in the ceremony when we were told that the clapper of the bell had come off and they said 'ring ring ring' for the sound of the bell. It was a fun and unforgettable moment that they'll probably remember much more powerfully that what was planned. And with more humor. Which is always good for a marriage.



The Catering Company smoothly handled all the arrangements for the cocktail hour and the reception in the ballroom which is also graced with a life sized statue of a blue heron. And the dance floor was occupies for the rest of the evening.

I wish them great happiness as they begin this new adventure together.

Tonya and Frank at The Fearrington

Tonya and Frank show it's possible to have the most romantic wedding with just two people in a setting that most people think of as only suitable for larger gatherings.

On Sunday evening July 26th, with three guests in attendance Tonya and Frank were married in the landscaped garden at The Fearrington. The only others present were Jerry Dillard, their professional photographer, friend and owner of Dillard Studios, who provided all the excellent pictures here,

Ruby Prescott, owner of Blue Sands Music and a wonderful and versatile violinist, three friends, and me.

After the ceremony, the signing of the license,
and many thank you's and hugs,
we wished them well and
Tonya and Frank had dinner
at The Inn at The Fearrington.













When the wedding party is so small and makes such a small footprint on a setting, many locations charge little or nothing. I've walked with couples and their friends into Duke Gardens, Yates Mill Pond, gardens in downtown Hillsborough, the botannical gardens in Chapel Hill, and lots of other locations to officiate at small ceremonies. We meet in a parking lot and find a beautiful spot, most often chosen by the couple beforehand.



The only drawback is that you can't ensure privacy because the space isn't reserved. But with a typical ceremony lasting only about 20 minutes (especially if there are few formalities), this is seldom a problem.

Frank and Tonya had just the wedding they wanted,
celebrating their love in the words and setting that meant most to them.

And all of us in attendance relished our time with them.

Jenna and Tim at The Highgrove Estate on July 18th

The Highgrove Estate is a beautiful restored home just south of Fuquay-Varina and about 20 minutes drive south of Raleigh. It's perfect for a summer evening wedding. The vista from the ceremony site overlooks Laurel Lake, the patio catches any breeze that is possible, the house has a classic winding staircase that's perfect for pictures and ...





the estate has multiple wonderful settings for perfect photographs.


Stacy Borelli from Swank Photo and Studio took all the pictures you'll see in this posting. Jenna's parents came all the way from Tampa, Florida and Tim's were luckier to come the short distance from Zebulon, NC. In all, over 150 guests joined them on this special day.

Jenna and Tim were surrounded by family and close friends with 6 bridal attendants, 2 honorary bridal attendants, 2 flower girls and 7 groom's attendants in attendance. But the wide patio accommodated everyone beautifully. We even had room for a unity candle table and a small bottle of water stashed behind it just in case on this particularly hot day. (TIP: Noticing where the sun will be in the sky for your ceremony is especially helpful for North Carolina summer weddings.)




















After making sure that the right person had the rings and the mother's knew how to light the candles for the unity candle ceremony, we were ready to begin. Angela, from The Highgrove, was great in helping make sure every logistical detail was taken care of. We were also glad for the last moments of air conditioning as we lined up in the house before we entered into the hot sunshine. Aware of this possibility, Tim and Jenna chose ceremonial words that were rich in spirit and full of heart and warmth, and weren't long. They wanted a ceremony that was beautiful, romantic, elegant and family oriented. And this tone came through in their ceremony and in every aspect of the evening.



Music for the ceremony and for the reception was expertly provided by Ryan from Island Sound DJs and Video. He also provided a lapel microphone for me, which always makes it easier to be heard in outdoor settings.

I left while guests were enjoying cocktails at the many outdoor groupings on the patio, and the wedding party were having pictures taken - just before everyone entered into the elegant air-conditioned tent for the rest of the festivities.
Everyone had a great time.

Alex and Laura Wed at The Fearrington on July 3rd

July 3rd was surprisingly cool. I've been grateful for this summer weather, and we were all especially grateful that day. It was awhile back because I had some delicious vacation in August and am now catching up. On that balmy evening I had the pleasure of marrying Alex and Laura at The Fearrington, in Chatham County on 15-501 just south of Chapel Hill.

The elegance of their wedding was matched by the elegance of their photographs taken by Logan Jarrard, of Logan Jarrard Photography. You can see more of his work for Laura and Alex on his blog. (Click on 'blog' to go straight there.)

The ceremony was held in the gazebo under the old huge Pecan tree which provided lots of welcome shade. As you can see there were chairs for two-hundred guests. Alex and Laura had grown up in Chapel Hill. Our DJ Gino, provided a microphone so that all the guests could hear every word. We also wanted to hear every note of the music played by Alex's dad and his Aunt Mary.

And Cheryl, from The Fearrington was essential in helping the day go smoothly. Thank you!


The only drawback was the pesky mosquitoes that love moist summer lawns in NC. But Alex and Laura planned for this by having small spray bottles of herbal insect repellent at a table near where guests entered. We all bathed our ankles liberally before the service.

(TIP: As a minister, I keep a bottle of this in my 'kit bag' at all times. No one wants to be distracted by mosquito bites during a ceremony.)

It was a perfect day. It was unseasonably cool on Friday July 3rd and we were all grateful. Even with this advantage though, all the guests were grateful for the wedding programs that doubled as fans. I can't speak highly of the advantage of this small hand-made breeze in our hot muggy summers. Even the famous Fearrington cows were content. We could hear them lowing now and again in the field nearby.

Alex and Laura were radiant and at ease as their ceremony approached. They'd been together for years and were surrounded by all their friends of long standing. They had met on the track team in high school and had been together ever since. And in the next month would be moving to Pennsylvania for Laura to begin medical school.

They incorporated several unique elements to their ceremony. Both Laura and Alex's parents spoke words of blessing to them in their own words. They had written love letters to each other and put them, unopened, in a box with a bottle of wine, sealing the box as part of the ceremony. It was to be opened when they needed to be reminded of their love for each other or on their twentieth anniversary, whichever came first.

I laud Alex and Laura for their relaxed manner during the ceremony. Even though I knew they were excited and eager for this day, they were surrounded by those who loved them, and they knew that nothing could go wrong that would spoil the intent of their day. They truly enjoyed their day.














Their attendants, Lisa and Nicholas, signed the licenses in the Garden Room at The Fearrington while everyone was cooling down a moment before pictures. During this time the guests made their way down to the barn.

After the ceremony, and after pictures of the wedding party, Logan Jarrard Alex and Laura to another of the wonderful lawns at The Fearrington for some pictures while all the guests enjoyed the cool of The Barn and refreshments before the reception.

Don't let the name confuse, you. You can tell by the elegance of the setting that the barn is now anything but a barn. But the stalls for the dairy cows are still intact in the hall as you enter this elegant setting.


I wish them many blessings as they begin this new adventure in their lives together!

David and Andrea's Wedding June 27th

I performed a simple ceremony for David and Andrea on this quiet Saturday evening in a small ceremony at Yates Mill Pond in Raleigh, off Lake Wheeler Road.

The park let them use the small 4-row semi-circular amphitheater at no cost but they couldn't reserve the spot. So our small group of thirteen, made up of family and friends met in the parking lot and made our way down the short path to the amphitheater.


Andrea's father came all the way from Denmark to give her away.




David and Andrea had several milestones in the last three months. They were pregnant with twins and had just bought a house. After this final milestone of their wedding, they were going to rest up for the arrival of their twin girls. They hoped for a larger celebration after the birth of their girls but family and friends were joyful as we met the photographer and carried the CD player to the small private setting.

Andrea and David felt that fate had somehow guided them to each other. They met on Facebook here in NC but they found that they had been in the same place at the same time five times in their past up in the small town they both came from in Connecticut.
In this ceremony we celebrated both their commitment to each other with the beautiful ceremony of Celtic Handfasting, and we celebrated the new family they are creating with special words of welcome for their daughters.

It was a hot North Carolina muggy Saturday so they made sure that everyone had plenty of cold water around. Last pictures were taken on the bridge over the pond as everyone enjoyed a champagne toast before this loving group of family and friends went off to dinner at a nearby restaurant.

Gina McLean Photography provided the wonderful pictures for the event.

Kendra and Scott at 1705 Prime in Raleigh

I just got some wonderful pictures!









On June 20th I married Kendra and Scott at 1705 Prime in Raleigh on East Millbrook Road.

It was an intimate wedding site for their close family and friends and this was the perfect venue for it. Parents and honored guests sat in chairs facing the wedding party. Guests sat at tables in a semi-circle around the hardwood floor dance floor. This was also where Kendra and Scott and their wedding party stood.

We were all grateful on this hot summer day for this comfortable and easy venue.

Musicians played 'The Luckiest' when Scott entered with his parents. And indeed he and Kendra both beamed during their whole wedding.

They had some unique elements to their ceremony which befitted their fun personalities.

They said their vows with their hands placed upon a Scottish Oathing Stone (you can find out more about Scottish wedding customs here). This was a real stone from Scotland brought all the way here by Kendra's Maid of Honor who had flown in the night before. Kendra and Scott both placed their hands upon the stone then we said these words of introduction:

'The vows Kendra and Scott make together this day will provide a firm foundation for the life they share together from this day forward. To symbolize this firm foundation they will be borrowing from an old Scottish Tradition in which the couple will use an Oathing Stone to set their vows in stone.' They then proceeded with vows in their own words that they spoke to each other.

Their rings were carried into the ceremony each in its own beautifully decorated box carried each carried by an earnest young ring bearer. They were placed on the small table behind me until we were ready for them.















They ended with an Irish Wedding Blessing spoken by two young nieces:

May you always have enough happiness to keep you sweet
Enough trials to keep you strong
Success to make you eager
Friends to give you comfort
Wealth to meet your needs
Enthusiasm to look for tomorrow
And a growing love to make each day better than the day before.

Their ceremony was also rich in other music perfect for a wedding.
To honor those family members who had passed on their friend sang a beautiful rendition of 'I'll Be Seeing You.' And another friend sang the Sarah McLaughlin song 'Push' which was a particular favorite of theirs. I loved how their warm and loving personalities shone throughout the whole occasion. I wish them many blessings.

A Few of My June and July Weddings

I only have pictures for a few of the couples I married in June and July (so far), so more will come!

On June 6th I married Rebecca and Gilbert at her parent's home in Durham.

They chose a small quiet ceremony to celebrate their love. Rebecca and Gilbert each had one attendant and Rebecca's daughter was the flower girl.

They introduced me to a new poem that day for their ceremony. It is 'I Saw Two Clouds at Morning' by John Gardener Brainard:

"I saw two clouds at morning,
Tinged with the rising sun,
And in the dawn they floated on,
And mingled into one;

I thought that morning cloud was blest,
it moved so sweetly to the west.

I saw two summer currents
Flow smoothly to their meeting,
And join their course,
with silent force,
In peace each other greeting:
Calm was their course through banks of green,
While dimpling eddies played between.

Such be your gentle motion,
Till life's last pulse shall beat;
Like summer's beam, and summer's stream,
Float on, in joy, to meet
A Calmer sea, where storms shall cease -
A purer sky, where all is peace."

Their wedding day spoke of the poem. It was blue, sunny, and not too hot, especially because the couple chose 10 am for their wedding time. Rebecca also chose red Gerber Daisies to provide color and the lush foliage did the rest.

I hadn't met Rebecca or Gilbert before their wedding. We did all the planning by email and phone since they chose my 'just us' ceremony option with keeps things simple.

It was a delight to meet them and their families, who comfortably sat on the back porch during the ceremony.

On Sunday, June 14th, I married Tim and Kristina at The Matthews House in Cary. Their photographer was Gillian Carlin of Diane McKinney Photography.



Tim and Kristina chose to have a small huppah in their ceremony. In the Jewish faith, it's a symbolic representation of the home they will create. For Tim and Kristina, it also ensured that they would have shade for their ceremony on the sunny day.

Tim and Kristina are friends of my nephew and niece-in-law, who I had married three years before, so for me, the day felt like being with family.





To get pictures of Kristina coming down the aisle, Gillian found a spot behind the huppah where she had a perfect view without being seen by the guests.

The enclosed garden of The Matthews House provided privacy and created an intimate space for the ceremony. You can notice the brick wall behind Kristina and her father.




The Matthews House gave the whole day the touch of elegance the couple wanted which wonderfully complemented their playful exuberance and delight in their day.









Tim and Kristina chose the words of the Celtic Handfasting Ceremony as part of their wedding. They left out the use of the handfasting cord, but included the powerful symbolism of acknowledging the hands of your beloved that will be there to comfort you in times of trial and grief, there to hold your children as they grow, and there to hold you as you go through life together. There were some teary moments in this heartwarming ceremony.

I also loved how Tim was comfortable on this warm day in the classic way of the Southern gentleman, with a linen suit.

Tamara Hedgepeth was their wedding director and she was wonderful. With 5 attendants on each side, 3 flower girls, and a ring bearer there were lots of people for her to wrangle, help relax, and get to the right place at the right time. Thank heavens for her easy grace and patient manner.







The music for the ceremony and the reception was provided by DJ John Williford of Carolina Productions. He had a great line of sight from the porch of the Matthews House so coordination was easy and the sound was great. Then he only had to move about 20 feet to be ready for the reception.

It was great to work with so many wonderful professionals.

On July 4th I married Angela and Matt at The Umstead Hotel and Spa in Cary. They chose that date because they loved the idea of having fireworks every year on their anniversary and from the start their wedding had its own flair and pizazz.


Matt is a chef, so he and each of his attendants wore a boutonniére of herbs instead of flowers. They vowed they would eat them by the end of the evening.

Angela's attendants wore red with black Converse high-tops, and Matt and his attendants wore black formal wear with red vests and red Converse high-tops. As you can see, the bride also had a touch of red on her gown.

I loved the way the Angela's attendants strode down the aisle with a saucy step sure of their footing. With so many outdoor wedding venues, women sink into the ground when they wear high heels, making it definitely precarious to walk gracefully.






Amy, at The Umstead, ensured that the timing was perfect and greeted the newly weds with a champagne toast right after the ceremony as we waited for the guests to go to the cocktail hour before we went to the wedding site for post-wedding pictures. The Umstead also has a very experienced 'sound' man and microphone system so that everyone could hear every word of the ceremony.

Summer Gibbs of Summer Gibbs Photography was the wonderful photographer. Angela and Matt's friends uploaded these images to www.snapfish.com. Summer's images will come soon.

We successfully bubbled the couple and the wedding party and they recessed to the music of the Darth Vadar theme from Star Wars. Can you tell that the couple are science fiction fans?



On July 9th I was on Ocracoke Island in the Outer Banks to marry the daughter of my dear friend, Pat. Liz (as her friends call her), or Bess (as her family knows her) and her fiancé Mike decided that, even though they now live in New York City, they wanted to be married on the beach where Mike proposed. After the ceremony we all went to a local seafood restaurant called The Back Porch, for dinner.

Ocracoke is a very small town on a very small island. It feels like small friendly neighborhood. Bess and Mike's families rented beach houses for the week before the ceremony and they and the wedding party relaxed and ate good food at each others' houses. We arrived a day early to have the rehearsal which was essential in such a wide open setting.

Bess and Mike had only about 40 people at their wedding but had a reception in Durham on the next Saturday night for all their friends from high school and college days.

In the wedding, Bess and Mike's dog Dinali was ritually walked down the aisle as part of the processional by one of her attendants. Then Dinali was handed off to a willing friend. It worked well in this casual setting. In the ceremony we spoke of the powerful symbol of the ocean in their lives and it's meaning to their marriage. Here is a part of the ritual I wrote for them:

"Water is the elemental force of nature on this our water planet. It sustains all life. And it is only here at the ocean that we can truly understand the magnitude of its depth, breath, and power. So too is the power of love. It defies containment, definition and comprehension. It moves us with its mystery and its majesty. We realized that we are just a drop in its totality. marriage moves u closer to experiencing this with wonder. Through marriage, we come closer to the larger flow of life and love that are beyond our control. We experience how we must both surrender to the tides of life and love within us, and to learn to navigate their currents, to understand that we stand always at the edge of what we do not know."

I loved seeing the long hug shared by Pat and her daughter after the ceremony. That's me in the background in the black and white dress. I chose that dress first because Bess told me to wear what was comfortable. Then I chose it to provide a strong visual focal point for the ceremony against the long expanses of sky, sea, and beach.

We had to navigate some strong winds during the wedding but all went well. In fact it was a cloudy cool day until about an hour before the ceremony when the sun came out. We were all amazed by Mike and Bess's luck.



Their cake at the reception in Durham was by Tracey of SugarPunk, Confections with Conviction. It honored the couple's love of Ocracoke, the beach and the lighthouse which is the most famous sight on the island.

The reception was held at The Four Points Durham near Southpoint Mall and the fabulous dinner was catered by Foster's Market in Durham. Both were excellent! And the dance floor got lots of action that evening.