The Rigmor House, The Highgrove Estate, The Matthews House, and The Rand-Bryan House

Sometimes I get photos of venues that I'm unable to use because I don't get pictures from couples of their wedding. I thought you might like a closer look at four of them - all lovely - all in the Raleigh Durham triangle. I have other blog posts on some of them with more pictures.

The first is the Rigmor House (in the picture above) just off of I-54 going west out of Chapel Hill. I've done several ceremonies here but this is the first time I got pictures. It's a great location for an intimate lodge wedding. It's off the road, quiet, with a large center room and rooms to stay upstairs. It has a big well stocked kitchen, a large veranda and a large lot. While the lot isn't all that scenic it is spacious and easy to use with room for a tent and lots of different possibilities. It also has great parking and a fabulous kitchen. They turn the place over to you and you either cater in or do it yourself.

Their website is a really good one, too. At Christi and William's wedding below, they did the decorations themselves with the help of family and friends and did a fabulous job. Both grad students at UNC, their families all came up from Mississippi and pitched right in. They've been together 7 years so everyone worked well together to make the place literally sparkle.

The main room at the Rigmor is two stories high and is in wood paneling. The upstairs rooms rim this two story room. There's an inset in the front wall, behind this wall in the entry foyer and the front porch. This inset is a great place for a buffet. Christi and Williams' guests faced this wall. They had a slide show of pictures of them before the ceremony, then this decoration, with the unity candle for the ceremony.

They used silver metallic wide ribbon for the table decorations. Here is the head table set up right after the seating was removed after the ceremony as they're setting up long tables for the reception dinner.

Here's the well stocked kitchen they relied on.

And here is the main room looking toward the back wall while folks are setting up tables for the reception. At this time William and Christi were having pictures taken.

You can see the trellis that Christi and William entered under as they walked down the aisle.
Since their wedding was only two weeks ago I hope to get more pictures to show you of this great couple and their charming hands on wedding. And I'm glad to finally have some pictures of Rigmor House to share with you.

The Highgrove Estate in Fuquay Varina is also a great venue. Their staff is fabulous is helping everything run smoothly. Justin and Kerry married on a busy Saturday in June and I needed to leave right after the wedding. This front porch is a favorite location for pictures.


This is the long hallway where the wedding party gathers before they process straight out to stand on the brick patio facing the lake. The couple and their attendants can dress in the house, but receptions are held in a tent behind the house. As you look out this door the tent is to the right. The website for The Highgrove has great photos of the tent for several different weddings.

This is the room where you can get dressed. Gotta love that mirror. It's a huge room with a private bath of course and it is roomy enough for lots of attendants.

The final picture is the lower patio which is the ceremony site. The upper patio to the left of the outside door is where guests go for the cocktail hour. My only concern ever with this great location is that at 5:30 on a hot summer NC evening the sun is shining directly on the ceremony site. It hits the couple full force. They're facing away from the sun but it's still pretty hot. At The Highgrove Estate we make an effort to keep everyone in the cool of the hallway as long as possible. Yet the site is so lovely that it's a great venue. And many days it's just perfect. And the tent is air conditioned.


The Matthews House in Cary is an elegant house in which to stay and/ or have cocktails, a walled lawn with a trellis that's great for an outdoor ceremony and a side building connected to the house via a covered patio. Both the patio and the side building can be used to suit your needs.


The above pictures is from Ryan and Jenna's wedding in May of 2010.
On October 1st I married Jim and Debbie here. I'd never officiated a wedding in the reception room before so I wanted to show you those possibilities. I got a couple of fun pictures that might help. BTW - the web site for The Matthews House is really spectacular.

In the picture below you see at the right where Brian McGuire set up the DJ equipment for both the ceremony and the reception. He is a consummate professional and lots of fun. It was a delight to work with him again.

Here are the place settings for the reception in keeping with her colors of Hydrangea blue and silver gray. The Matthews House also did the catering.


This is Debbie and Jim's cake made by Miel Bon Bons in Chapel Hill. Their desserts are delicious as well as gorgeous.

This is the where Debbie dressed with Graham Terhune the photographer taking pictures of Debbie dressing. A fun part of being a female wedding minister was getting to visit Debbie while pre-wedding pictures were being taken.

I never got a pictures of Jim and Debbie together after the ceremony. It must have been a busy day. I loved this couple. They exemplify all that falling in love a little later in life can bring. The amazing joy of finding someone just right for you and the playfulness that brings out in you.

Below is a picture from Tim and Kristina's wedding in 2009 at The Matthews House. Another wonderful picture. This one by Diane McKinney Photography.



The Rand-Bryan House is another versatile and lovely venue. Set off the road in Garner it's a restored house with a wonderful openness. Every wedding I do here carries the unique stamp of the couple since the white on white decor and the amazing large picture window. Martha Liles and her husband are gracious hosts, very knowledgeable and very helpful.

They have a big front porch with rocking chairs that's perfect for the cocktail hour. And I've done beautiful weddings on their side lawn, but my favorite room is the one in the picture below which is stunning.

Here it is decorated for Lauren's and Brian's November wedding on a gorgeous day. You can see the lush green side lawn outside the window better from the picture below.


The next picture is taken from that window looking back into the main room. This room would be transformed for reception seating after the ceremony. At the back right is the entrance to the kitchen and there is a door to the back yard from the back right, too.

The large double doors go into a square room that is off the front hall which is a great room for displaying the cake or for smaller weddings for serving hors d'oeuvres.



This couple used only two of these wonderfully creative decorations in the front of their ceremony. It was plenty and lovely.

This couple got their delicious food catered by Whole Foods in Raleigh and served by The Happiest Hostess. They found that this was a much less expensive way to have excellent food catered for their size reception.

These weddings all went smoothly and elegantly - in large part because these venues are so suited to the needs of a wedding and are so well cared for and loved by their staffs. It's a treat to be the minister at a wedding at any of these locations. And I hope you enjoy these pictures.

Ryan and Jenna at The Matthews House on May 15 at The Matthews House in Cary

There are times when I miss getting photographs of a wedding and regret it. Some couples just linger in your memories longer than others. For me, its the couples whose generosity of spirit just shines from them. The ones whose love for each other seems to touch all those around them. Ryan and Jenna are like that.

So I was sad that I had somehow let getting pictures of their ceremony slip from my awareness. Most times at a wedding I'm just too busy making sure that everything is going smoothly that I forget to take a few pictures of my own. I'm pinning on boutonnieres or taking instructions from one person to the other, or double checking with the musicians or the venue or providing safety pins or putting out a guest book. Or finding a quiet place to read through the ceremony one last time so that I can be completely present with the bride and groom during their ceremony.

Jessica Key, their wonderful photographer from Jessica Key Photography, offered me these pictures when I emailed her and I was delighted. Her manner was easy going and fun and she got some great shots. And there were many great shots to be had. Jenna and Ryan had their wedding May 15th at The Matthews House in Cary.


It's a lovely restored house with a separate building for receptions and a lovely side yard with a trellis at the end which makes a perfect ceremony site.


The DJ or musicians can set up on the covered porch which is also ideal. For Ryan and Jenna's wedding Gregg Ramsey of DJ Bunn did the reception music, and Florian Music provided the string trio for the ceremony. They were great. Jill, of Preston Flowers in Cary was the florist. Ryan and Jenna had been friends in a close group of friend for four years before their friendship caught fire and deepened into love. And it felt natural, like coming home. These three years later, it still did.

At their ceremony we said, 'And now you stand before your family ,ready to acknowledge to God and to the world: this is my beloved, the one with whom I choose to create the rest of my life.' It never felt more true.

They had their close group of friends all with them on their wedding day, all celebrating that two of their own had found such happiness.


After their ceremony I got this wonderful email:


Hi Robin! Yes the wedding was so nice and we were very glad that you got to be a part of it. You did a wonderful job and everyone that I talked to had really nice things to say about the way that you handled not only the ceremony, but the moments before/after the ceremony as well as the rehearsal. Thank you so much for all that you did and I'm so glad that we chose you to be our officiant. We'll be seeing you again in a few days for Jolie's wedding!' (Which I officiated for them at the Shrine Club in Raleigh, and which is also a part of this blog.)

To give credit to some other wonderful wedding professionals: Their cake was made by Sandra at Edible Art Bakery in Raleigh, and their limousine was from White Horse Transportation in Raleigh.

I love it when I marry friends of couples I've met. It feels like the connection is never broken. A treat for me.

A Few of My June and July Weddings

I only have pictures for a few of the couples I married in June and July (so far), so more will come!

On June 6th I married Rebecca and Gilbert at her parent's home in Durham.

They chose a small quiet ceremony to celebrate their love. Rebecca and Gilbert each had one attendant and Rebecca's daughter was the flower girl.

They introduced me to a new poem that day for their ceremony. It is 'I Saw Two Clouds at Morning' by John Gardener Brainard:

"I saw two clouds at morning,
Tinged with the rising sun,
And in the dawn they floated on,
And mingled into one;

I thought that morning cloud was blest,
it moved so sweetly to the west.

I saw two summer currents
Flow smoothly to their meeting,
And join their course,
with silent force,
In peace each other greeting:
Calm was their course through banks of green,
While dimpling eddies played between.

Such be your gentle motion,
Till life's last pulse shall beat;
Like summer's beam, and summer's stream,
Float on, in joy, to meet
A Calmer sea, where storms shall cease -
A purer sky, where all is peace."

Their wedding day spoke of the poem. It was blue, sunny, and not too hot, especially because the couple chose 10 am for their wedding time. Rebecca also chose red Gerber Daisies to provide color and the lush foliage did the rest.

I hadn't met Rebecca or Gilbert before their wedding. We did all the planning by email and phone since they chose my 'just us' ceremony option with keeps things simple.

It was a delight to meet them and their families, who comfortably sat on the back porch during the ceremony.

On Sunday, June 14th, I married Tim and Kristina at The Matthews House in Cary. Their photographer was Gillian Carlin of Diane McKinney Photography.



Tim and Kristina chose to have a small huppah in their ceremony. In the Jewish faith, it's a symbolic representation of the home they will create. For Tim and Kristina, it also ensured that they would have shade for their ceremony on the sunny day.

Tim and Kristina are friends of my nephew and niece-in-law, who I had married three years before, so for me, the day felt like being with family.





To get pictures of Kristina coming down the aisle, Gillian found a spot behind the huppah where she had a perfect view without being seen by the guests.

The enclosed garden of The Matthews House provided privacy and created an intimate space for the ceremony. You can notice the brick wall behind Kristina and her father.




The Matthews House gave the whole day the touch of elegance the couple wanted which wonderfully complemented their playful exuberance and delight in their day.









Tim and Kristina chose the words of the Celtic Handfasting Ceremony as part of their wedding. They left out the use of the handfasting cord, but included the powerful symbolism of acknowledging the hands of your beloved that will be there to comfort you in times of trial and grief, there to hold your children as they grow, and there to hold you as you go through life together. There were some teary moments in this heartwarming ceremony.

I also loved how Tim was comfortable on this warm day in the classic way of the Southern gentleman, with a linen suit.

Tamara Hedgepeth was their wedding director and she was wonderful. With 5 attendants on each side, 3 flower girls, and a ring bearer there were lots of people for her to wrangle, help relax, and get to the right place at the right time. Thank heavens for her easy grace and patient manner.







The music for the ceremony and the reception was provided by DJ John Williford of Carolina Productions. He had a great line of sight from the porch of the Matthews House so coordination was easy and the sound was great. Then he only had to move about 20 feet to be ready for the reception.

It was great to work with so many wonderful professionals.

On July 4th I married Angela and Matt at The Umstead Hotel and Spa in Cary. They chose that date because they loved the idea of having fireworks every year on their anniversary and from the start their wedding had its own flair and pizazz.


Matt is a chef, so he and each of his attendants wore a boutonniére of herbs instead of flowers. They vowed they would eat them by the end of the evening.

Angela's attendants wore red with black Converse high-tops, and Matt and his attendants wore black formal wear with red vests and red Converse high-tops. As you can see, the bride also had a touch of red on her gown.

I loved the way the Angela's attendants strode down the aisle with a saucy step sure of their footing. With so many outdoor wedding venues, women sink into the ground when they wear high heels, making it definitely precarious to walk gracefully.






Amy, at The Umstead, ensured that the timing was perfect and greeted the newly weds with a champagne toast right after the ceremony as we waited for the guests to go to the cocktail hour before we went to the wedding site for post-wedding pictures. The Umstead also has a very experienced 'sound' man and microphone system so that everyone could hear every word of the ceremony.

Summer Gibbs of Summer Gibbs Photography was the wonderful photographer. Angela and Matt's friends uploaded these images to www.snapfish.com. Summer's images will come soon.

We successfully bubbled the couple and the wedding party and they recessed to the music of the Darth Vadar theme from Star Wars. Can you tell that the couple are science fiction fans?



On July 9th I was on Ocracoke Island in the Outer Banks to marry the daughter of my dear friend, Pat. Liz (as her friends call her), or Bess (as her family knows her) and her fiancé Mike decided that, even though they now live in New York City, they wanted to be married on the beach where Mike proposed. After the ceremony we all went to a local seafood restaurant called The Back Porch, for dinner.

Ocracoke is a very small town on a very small island. It feels like small friendly neighborhood. Bess and Mike's families rented beach houses for the week before the ceremony and they and the wedding party relaxed and ate good food at each others' houses. We arrived a day early to have the rehearsal which was essential in such a wide open setting.

Bess and Mike had only about 40 people at their wedding but had a reception in Durham on the next Saturday night for all their friends from high school and college days.

In the wedding, Bess and Mike's dog Dinali was ritually walked down the aisle as part of the processional by one of her attendants. Then Dinali was handed off to a willing friend. It worked well in this casual setting. In the ceremony we spoke of the powerful symbol of the ocean in their lives and it's meaning to their marriage. Here is a part of the ritual I wrote for them:

"Water is the elemental force of nature on this our water planet. It sustains all life. And it is only here at the ocean that we can truly understand the magnitude of its depth, breath, and power. So too is the power of love. It defies containment, definition and comprehension. It moves us with its mystery and its majesty. We realized that we are just a drop in its totality. marriage moves u closer to experiencing this with wonder. Through marriage, we come closer to the larger flow of life and love that are beyond our control. We experience how we must both surrender to the tides of life and love within us, and to learn to navigate their currents, to understand that we stand always at the edge of what we do not know."

I loved seeing the long hug shared by Pat and her daughter after the ceremony. That's me in the background in the black and white dress. I chose that dress first because Bess told me to wear what was comfortable. Then I chose it to provide a strong visual focal point for the ceremony against the long expanses of sky, sea, and beach.

We had to navigate some strong winds during the wedding but all went well. In fact it was a cloudy cool day until about an hour before the ceremony when the sun came out. We were all amazed by Mike and Bess's luck.



Their cake at the reception in Durham was by Tracey of SugarPunk, Confections with Conviction. It honored the couple's love of Ocracoke, the beach and the lighthouse which is the most famous sight on the island.

The reception was held at The Four Points Durham near Southpoint Mall and the fabulous dinner was catered by Foster's Market in Durham. Both were excellent! And the dance floor got lots of action that evening.